Ch-Ch-Ch-Chatter.

I’m sorry I didn’t post anything yesterday—I couldn’t type because my fingers were frozen:

Don’t mind me, though: they thawed out once I chopped down the tree outside, stuffed it in my fireplace, doused it in lighter fluid and let ‘er rip. Child’s play, really.

In my Canadian literature class, I’m reading some excerpts from Roughing It in the Bush, by an early Canadian settler, Susanna Moodie.  The opening lines of her narrative include this theory, which I found particularly prophetic:

“In most instances, emigration is a matter of necessity….  Few educated persons, accustomed to the refinements and luxuries of European society, ever willingly relinquish those advantages, and place themselves beyond the protective influence of the wise and revered institutions of their native land, without urgent case.  Emigration may, indeed, generally be regarded as an act of severe duty, performed at the expense of personal enjoyment…”

I know, I know.  It sounds like a whole lot of blather.  [This is what I have to put up with every day.  Seriously.]  Since I’m majoring in English, and because it’s my job, I will now attempt to decipher Ms. Moodie’s words, and translate them into present-day lingo:

“Almost without fail, people who move to Canada do it because they have to. No self-respecting person with half a brain would leave their nice, warm countries willingly, just so they could traipse through the freaking barren wasteland with nothing but the shirt on their backs, unless they were in dire straits. Generally speaking, emigration is a last resort, and a total drag at that.”

Okay, Canadians: before you get all huffy, just keep in mind that Susanna Moodie said these things, not me.  I was just sitting there, minding my own business and reading my assigned chapters, when suddenly BAM!  The aforementioned lines jumped off the page and bit me in the nose (figuratively speaking).

Of course, she might have written them, but I can’t say that I deny her words, either.  In fact, she’s actually got a really good point:  I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be living here now if I had any (seriously…any) other option.  It’s a beautiful country; it really is.  I like the people, I like my neighborhood, I like the government, I like the free health care…

…But I don’t like the cold.  And it’s really cold.

See there, under “Tonight?”  It reads, “Bitterly cold.”  Bitter. Cold.  Even the weather channel can’t deny it.

And I know, I talk about it all the time.  I’m sorry, truly.  I’ll stop talking about it when my brain defrosts and can think of something else to say.

About Camille

I'm Camille. I have a butt-chin. I live in Canada. I was born in Arizona. I like Diet Dr. Pepper. Hello. You can find me on Twitter @archiveslives, Facebook at facebook.com/archivesofourlives, instagram at ArchivesLives, and elsewhere.
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