Death by Consumerism

As you know, I struggle with group projects.

If I could have done it my way, I would have turned in this as my ballad:

Death By Consumerism

(Dedicated to Jdimytai Damour, 34 years)

‘Twas a perilous time to be waitin’ in line
For a steal of a deal in November.
They’d slept there all night under parking lot lights,
For a steal of a deal in November.

And behind the glass doors, a man lowly and poor
Had an eight-to-five shift in November.
He’d figured the math; he’d make time-and-a-half
So he offered to work that November.

He mentioned out loud, “This is one mighty crowd,”
And he worried they might become antsy.
“I had best do my best to protect my blue vest;
If I have to, I’ll try something fancy.”

As the hour drew near, the mob waited in fear
That they might not secure the year’s presents.
Each one of them planned to outrun the next man
In the quest to secure the year’s presents.

And behind the glass door, the man lowly and poor
Said, “It’s time,” and he went to unlock it.
As he did, they rushed in, each one looking to win
In the battle to empty their pockets.

Image from here.

All the shoppers despaired there was no time to spare
As they elbowed their way through the entrance.
Then up through the mass came a cry from a lass
Who had tripped on a fellow by mischance.

“Is it me? Can it be what I think that I see,
There’s a man and he looks to be trampled.
Well I hope he’s okay, he’ll get better someday
As for me, I see coupons and samples.”

Still behind the glass doors, the man trodden and poor
Caught his breath, but too soon it was lost.
Looking up at a sign that read $3.99
His last thought: “It was not worth the cost.”

So there it is, ladies and gentlemen.  That’s what I can produce in 40 minutes by myself versus 40 minutes in a group.

p.s.  I’m joining in on all the Spin Cycle fun, hosted weekly by Sprite’s Keeper. The theme of the week was “Rhyme Time,” which just happened to fit perfectly with the theme of my life this week. Only as an English major would I ever consider rhymes a central part of my life.  What have I done…

About Camille

I'm Camille. I have a butt-chin. I live in Canada. I was born in Arizona. I like Diet Dr. Pepper. Hello. You can find me on Twitter @archiveslives, Facebook at, instagram at ArchivesLives, and elsewhere.
This entry was posted in my edjumacation and me, sad things, spin cycle, what I'm about and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Death by Consumerism

  1. Holly Decker says:

    i’m first… booyah.

    love it.
    ditch the group, yo.

  2. anna says:

    I’m not gonna lie… that’s kind of a sad poem. And that newstory pretty much made me sick. But I do have to say that your reference to Wal Mart as Satan’s supermarket in a previous post still makes me laugh. Ha ha. See, still laughing.

  3. What an amazing poem. Award winning, even. You should submit it for a contest that makes you lot of money so poor kyle can quit that awful theatre cleaning job. :) I never shop on black friday, especially not when the stores open and all the super crazies are out.

  4. kristi says:

    Group schmoup.

    Great poem and I don’t even like poems. That poor man. I had a pit in my stomach for a long time when I read the news that day.

  5. That’s 40 minutes on your own without group involvement? You’re good. You’re very good! A somber story showcasing ignorance and greed, you did a wonderful send up. You’re linked and welcome to the Spin Cycle!

  6. whitney says:

    Camille you pretty much rock my world. Ditch the group!

  7. Ginger says:

    This was FABULOUS! Thought provoking, and I love how you used the same words repetitively to drive home your point. I agree with the person who said this poem is a potential award winner.

  8. Camille says:

    Holly Decker– Thanks! Boo yah too!

    anna– I know it’s sad. I was actually hoping I could write it in humour, but the more I thought about it, the less funny it became. Now it’s just…wel…SAD. Wal-Mart IS Satan’s supermarket.

    Molly Rawlins– Thanks! I wouldn’t say it’s award winning, but it’s definitely better than the first one I had to submit.

    Kristi– I don’t like poems either! I only write them when I have to.

    Sprite’s Keeper– Yay! I’m in the club! I feel so…elite.

    Whitney– I will do my best. I really will.

    Ginger– Cool! A new friend! Thank you for stopping by, and for your nice feedback.

  9. HeatherPride says:

    This story made me absolutely ill. I still can’t believe this happened. It’s surreal.

    Great poem, sobering subject.

  10. Anonymous says:


    What happened with the whole ordeal?

  11. niki says:

    man, you’re amazing. true talent, my friend. i agree, it is pretty sad. but well put, my friend, well put.

  12. DeAnna says:

    I agree, ditch the group. Truly an epic, thought provoking poem, definately something that could win an award.

  13. NobodyNose says:

    hold on a second while I stop crying….. wow depressing.
    Yet so true!

  14. At’s insane!
    Get walked on to death so folks save pennies on crap they don’t need?

    Cool poem. Crazy, man. what a world.

  15. anonymous says:

    i agree with everyone- that story made me feel literally sick. of course such an awful thing like that would happen at walmart, the center of all evil.

  16. Shangrila says:

    You wrote that in 40 minutes? Wow. I can’t even find a pen and paper in forty minutes.

Comments are closed.