I Lost 9 Pounds and All I Got Was This Lousy Post.

I’ve lost nine pounds since January 1st, which means I’m 16 pounds away from my goal weight, and 6 pounds away from the skinniest I’ve ever been.  I’m quite pleased, thanks.  I haven’t had a bite of sweets this year, I’ve been striving to eat healthy snacks like homemade (sugar-free) granola, salads, wheat bread, carrots, tomatoes, yoghurt, nuts, and berries.  In other words, eat like a squirrel and you, too, can lose weight.

Seriously, though, it’s given me hope for the future. I mean, since the world is evidently going to pot, it’s nice to know I’ll be able to live in the woods and forage for food without missing a beat, while the rest of the world offers their life’s savings for the last gallon of 2% milk at Safeway™.

Along with making my own granola, I’ve learned the most delicious recipe for salsa, tried my hand (and succeeded) at homemade organic yoghurt, and I am currently brewing my very own batch of Diet Dr. Pepper in the backyard.  I don’t want to be without it during my last days.

Unfortunately, despite all my noble weight-loss efforts, I haven’t been able to see a lot of changes in my body. Let’s do a roll-call:

Buggy Eyes? Chin?

Check.  Check.

Second Chin?

Check.

Love handles?

Check left.  Check right.  Check.

Watch this:  they’ll go away if I stretch my arms way up high.  Go away, Love handles.

Check.  If only this was the normal way to walk.

Paunch?

Present.

Same trick works with Paunch:

Once again, though, it’s just not feasible to walk around with my hands behind my head all day.  It’s not natural.

Bum?

Check.

Thighs?

Check.

Dejection?

Heartbreak?

Check and check.

About Camille

I'm Camille. I have a butt-chin. I live in Canada. I was born in Arizona. I like Diet Dr. Pepper. Hello. You can find me on Twitter @archiveslives, Facebook at facebook.com/archivesofourlives, instagram at ArchivesLives, and elsewhere.
This entry was posted in change, Cutting Back, failures, photos, woe is me and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to I Lost 9 Pounds and All I Got Was This Lousy Post.

  1. Holly Decker says:

    first.
    mwuah hahah!

    you are so tech saavy… how did you do that tiny TM next to Safeway?

    anyways… on to the post.
    no, wait, i have something else to say… i linked you to my most recent post. yay you. famous on my page.

    k, now onto weight loss.
    i am happy for you.
    not jealous, not envious, not bitter… just happy for you that you are 9 lbs skinnier.
    thats right, i said SKINNIER. you are a babe, i dont care WHAT you say about your chin. and also… kudos for posting love handle, double chin, and rump pictures… i am WAY too proud to do that.

  2. Lauren says:

    Congrats! I would love to lose some weight. I am so impressed!!

    I am kinda sad because I only drink skim, I eat all of the diet foods you eat (except that’s what I have eaten everyday for years) and I can’t lose a pound. Sadness.

    And whatever about your “love handles”…where are they? I can’t see them…

  3. Umm. I need a diet (again). It’s kind of sad how little willpower I have. Tell me your secret.

  4. Camille says:

    Holly Decker– On a Mac, I type OPTION+2, and it equals: ™. If you have a PC, I don’t know what to tell you. Google probably knows. Oh yeah, and also? I have no pride anymore. No qualms. No tact.

    Lauren– Supposedly there’s a formula for it: Eat 500 calories less daily and burn 500 calories more (look at me talking all fancy like I’m an expert or something). I know that I can’t be cutting back on quantities of food, so instead I decided to eat more healthily and exercise more (more than NONE, which is what I had been doing since I got married). If you’re already eating well and working out, I’m out of ideas. Except to maybe just FORGET ABOUT IT, because you look great.

    Angela Hardison– No secret. See above response to Lauren. I have set this goal and for once in my life I’m actually motivated to do it. It’s the only motivation I have. You, on the other hand, own a company and do amazing work, and probably have no problem brushing your teeth every day. You win.

  5. anna says:

    I’m pretty sure regardless of my weight, I’ll always have a double chin, or maybe even extra neck skin/fat. It’s awesome, especially when I take tons of self portraits.

    9 pounds in a little over a month is great. Yay for you. Other things you can eat: radishes, green onions, romaine and turnips, says the stupid squirrel that’s eating my garden.

    Will you post your granola recipe? Please?

  6. anonymous says:

    Congratulations. Way to go.

  7. BOSSY says:

    Nope, you look great, nice try though. And cutest jeans eh-ver.

  8. HeatherPride says:

    Oh girl, I remember those days thinking I was fat when I was 120 pounds. You look terrific!! I’m not even kidding. I wish I looked like you!

  9. Geneva says:

    Hooray! I’m so proud of you! I have reached a depressing time. I am now gaining weight even though I’m getting skinnier. I assume that it is muscle mass nonsense, but really I just feel sad because the scale will never read lower than 155 again.

    (Pounds don’t matter. Pounds don’t matter. Pounds don’t matter…)

    Just keep on your quest! buy a treat for yourself though.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Millie,

    Hang in there! I think your face looks much thinner, if you want to know the truth. Keep on plugging away. It’s really going to start showing more soon.

  11. Camille says:

    anna– I will post the recipe just for you, my dear. Probably next week.

    anonymous– Who are you? Thanks.

    BOSSY– I always feel so famous when BOSSY comments on my blog. And those jeans are highwaters on me. You want ’em?

    HeatherPride– I know what you mean, I really do. I know after I have kids I am going to look back on these days and laugh. But before I have kids, I want to see that scale reach its destination. Even for just one DAY.

    Geneva– You must be exercising a lot. I mostly only take walks of jogs; no weight lifting. So I don’t run the risk of gaining muscle weight any time soon. You can console yourself with the fact that I cannot even bench press the ultra-light bar (no, I’m serious), and you could probably bench press ME if you wanted.

    Anonymous my sister– I take that compliment very seriously; you’re stingy with your praise, so I know you mean it. Thank you.

  12. Kimberly says:

    Don’t give up Camille, you’re looking great!!

  13. jami says:

    oh I feel your pain. I have been eating like a mouse for almost 4 weeks now, and all I have lost is 4 pounds. I have 6 more to go before hitting my goal weight. Now I do give myself a cheat meal. And I will be honest, there have been a couple of weak moments (who am I kidding…there have been at least 10 times). But for the most part I am eating REALLY healthy, and I work out ALL THE TIME. I guess I am going to have to be really strick with myself if I am going to get a flat tummy.
    also, how is pk taking the diet change. I just changed our family over to ALL whole wheat products. Tortillas, bagels, english muffins, bread, rice. SPencer is having a really have time.

  14. sarah says:

    Wow! I am impressed! I have such a sweet tooth that your diet would be very hard for me to do. You look great Camille!

  15. Katie says:

    Can I just say that you look fantastic. Really. You look great.

    And you’re my hero for making homemade Diet Dr. Pepper. Recipe, please!

  16. NobodyNose says:

    Sad freaking day.
    I’m all depressed now.
    Thanks.
    You’re a peach.

  17. raygon says:

    You can not be serious!?! you think you have buns and thighs and love handles? Camille…
    Who cares about all that anyway, you have cute hair and cute jeans. No one is looking at anything else!

  18. alexamae says:

    You go!! look at you, that is awesome. you look gorgeous. i dont think you should worry about losing any more weight. i do love reading your posts so much though. they make me laugh!

  19. anonymous says:

    you are thin. really, truly.

  20. Camille says:

    Kimberly– Thank you so much for the encouragement!

    Jami– According to what I’ve read, a pound a week is healthy! PK is taking the change well–he basically eats what I feed him at home and then goes out and buys whatever he’s craving. Dirty dog. He hasn’t lost one pound. He’s not even trying.

    sarah– I have a sweet tooth too…MAJORLY. I’ve resorted to the occasional sugar-free fudgesicle. It’s all I’ve got, but it helps.

    Katie– Thanks so much! The DDP was a total lie. I’m sorry (truly sorry. If it were real, think how amazing life would be!). But don’t feel bad. Poor Kyle bought it too.

    nobodynose– I’m sorry!

    Raygon– I do, but thanks for being nice anyway. You’re a good friend. The jeans? They’re too short for me. It’s pretty sad.

    alexamae– Wahoo! Thank you so much!

    anonymous– Nice.

    Crazy– Well thanks! I might have to start saying bleeblah—it sounds fun!!

  21. Crazy says:

    healthy weight, good way to live. 9 lbs in 39 days, extraordinary. Crazy even. You’ve always looked pretty to me.
    The abandonment of sweets, it works. FAST. And is good for you. We eat way too much sugar. When you’ve gone long without, you won’t want them anymore. Perhaps just in exception. But the sugar rush we do is not natural body behaviour. Empty calories, diabetis, bleeblahbleeblah. (I had a french-canadian bf once who said that, bleeblah…, was cute as hell..rough translation wise. And dang, could he play the trumpet. For the canadian armed forces in fact.)

  22. Bad says:

    oops, two colons, one backslash don’t work. My bad. Crazy bad. let’s try this again.

  23. Granamama says:

    AMAZING!!!!You must feel utterly self-fulfilled. However, I AM proud of you. You van look the way you want to look.
    Te amo,
    Granmmamamam

  24. Carmen says:

    Hey keep it up. I think you are amazing to go without sweets. I could never do it in a million years. Good work – 9 lbs in such a short time. Okay so I just reread what I wrote and it kindave sounds cheesey, but I truly am sincere and say yeah for you. Okay I will tell you why I think so, because I just lost 10lbs and I weigh less than I have ever before grade 9 or 10 and I feel great, and think it is such a huge accomplishment on my part, so I also feel the same way in your weight loss too.

  25. kate lines says:

    good for you. (blog stalker here) i went off diet coke for the new year. its sucks, aaaaand my pants are still to tight. and you look great. (even though i know thats not why you wrote this post, i figured it was the polite thing to do. and you really do look great.)

    your so funny.

  26. whitney says:

    9 pounds!! thats great! look at all things you are changing about your lifestyle. Pretty soon the inches are just going to fall off you. you look great!

  27. Pingback: This Pregnant Pause. | Archives of Our Lives

  28. My friend just tell me and I can’t believe it, Mike’s daughter are dead so tragedy and so sad. I am a big fan of him, he is a great guy, best boxer – crazy little bet but every body know him and like him.

  29. I lost my job right on my birthday with a greeting card. I heard about people loosingt they jobs – but I didn’t think it’s going to happened with me. I start looking for a new job. I got some money for now and I pretty good worker so I don’t think that going to be a big problem. I got couple offers so I think Life come back in shape.

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