Oops, I think I did it again.

Here’s a Project: Proxy update for you:

(p.s. If you want to know more about the Project: Proxy feature of my blog, click here, and your wildest dreams will come true. {Or at least your somewhat-reasonable dream of wanting to know the history behind Project: Proxy. That dream will come true.})

Remember how I gave up sugar for Lent at Jordan’s proxy request?

Well, I quit.

I’m sorry, Jordan. I have failed you. I’m a terrible proxy.

It went down like this: I kept seeing sugary treats everywhere, and I kept really wanting to eat them, but I held off for a month, until one day…I just got really sick of not eating sugar. I’ve succeeded in the task before, for much longer than one measly month (which is how long I lasted, to the date, this time). But I went to a church party (famous last word: church parties are always the death of me {something about all that home-cooked food prepared by someone other than me}) and I saw this cake there…

…and I just got really sick of pretending to be Catholic (ironic that my downfall was at a church party, eh?).

In my defense, that pudding/Cool Whip™ mixture on the top was quite succulent. (Though the chocolate shavings were nothing more than unnecessary calories—couldn’t even taste ’em.)

I’m really sorry, Jordan. The whole time I was devouring my piece of sheet cake, I couldn’t even really enjoy it (very much), because I knew I was letting you down.

That makes my score 0 for 2 as far as Project: Proxy projects have gone (first I chickened out of the Gallon Challenge, now this). This is shaping up to be not unlike my Freshman (grade 9) basketball season. (We were 0 for 21, but we were Carson Cougars, and if we were failures, at least we were consistent failures. Go Cougars.) I’m a flop. A failure. A complete and utter fiend. (Apparently failing is the one life skill I took away from Junior High {well, that, and the fact that french fries dipped in ketchup or ranch are DELICIOUS with pickles.})

Someone give me an easier project to act as a proxy for—doesn’t anyone need to know what Dairy Queen’s blizzard flavour of the month tastes like? Or how acupuncture feels? Or hot stone massages?

Seriously, ’cause I’m your girl for that.

Come back tomorrow for a giveaway that might dampen the blow of my lousiness.

About Camille

I'm Camille. I have a butt-chin. I live in Canada. I was born in Arizona. I like Diet Dr. Pepper. Hello. You can find me on Twitter @archiveslives, Facebook at facebook.com/archivesofourlives, instagram at ArchivesLives, and elsewhere.
This entry was posted in blogger finger, failures, fiascos, health and vitality, oh brother what next, Project: Proxy and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Oops, I think I did it again.

  1. I couldn’t do it either.

    BUT, I can’t wait for Saturday Steals because I think I got the best steals of, like, all time this week. (Although I loved your pin!) I was going to submit it this weekend, and then I didn’t, which actually worked out because it got even better. Can’t wait.

  2. chelsie says:

    I never knew that you played ball at carson…

  3. Tisha says:

    Ok, I have a proxy for you. I have always wanted to bleach my hair blonde, like white blonde, but been too chicken. And as for the Saturday steals, my week got away from me last week, but I now have 2 amazing deals to write about for this week so I’m totally excited!

  4. Chloe says:

    Ooh. Well, at least you tried!
    And now you’ll love me, because here is my new proxy for you (those last paragraphs you’ve written have inspired me, haha): I have always thought acupuncture was something stupid and painful. Why don’t you tell me how acupuncture feels like?

  5. Jordan says:

    It’s ok that you quit, you didn’t let me down! I actually gave up sugar for lent too and then cheated only a few weeks in. So you made it longer than me! Maybe together we made it the entire length of lent? It was a team effort!
    Once I cheated the first time I was like “screw it! I’m eating sugar every day again” oh-well.

  6. Katy says:

    HA HA HA!!!! You need to have a time limit on your Proxy challenges. Like it’s a one time thing.

    Will you try to do the whole only eat Raw food thing for like a day or two and tell us exactly what you ate? It’s something I want to try but I’m pregnant and I’m just eating WHAT I want WHEN I want. If you could do it, map it out for us, then maybe I could do it soon.


  7. Whenever I think about acupuncture I picture myself laying there feeling the sweet release, and then someone coming along and pressing all the needles into me with a board. and killing me. I just think it’s inevitable. I think it comes from having so many brothers.

    And that raw food thing from Katy – my mom ate raw food for two years and it killed her malignant breast cancer after her doctors had given up on her. It’s true.

  8. Pingback: Archives of Our Lives » Guh.

  9. Rachel says:

    Was it a Sunday? Lent doesn’t count on a Sunday. You could just pretend it was!

  10. Jessica says:

    I’m not sure why you think abstaining from a vice for Lent is only a Catholic tradition. If you were “pretending to be Catholic” you would have given up eating meat and poultry on Fridays during Lent. Can clarify your reasoning? Were you hoping to learn about another religion? I know this is part of your project of doing things that other people tell you to, but it might be nice to understand what you’re getting out of it.

  11. I’ve always wondered if people can actually do anything with those ridiculously long fingernails. You should get some and then let me know.

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