Scapegoats and Sundry Monsters

What do you do when bad things happen for no apparent reason?

I’ll tell you what I do. I try to place blame. I know it’s awful and lousy of me, and there is no good excuse for such irresponsible behaviour. I do it, though, because it makes me feel more at-ease to know that someone, somewhere made a mistake. Someone dropped the ball. Not I, of course, but…someone. I would be an horrible politician because I would probably always try to blame other people for my own errors.

In my defense, I would like to think I am a good person. I try so very hard not to be Bridezilla. But my wedding suppliers have repeatedly let me down this week, and it is taking its toll on my nice-lady facade. The first time my seamstress (who is making my wedding dress from scratch, without a pattern or anything) stood me up for a fitting, I was very sweet and understanding. “She’s probably been really busy,” I thought innocently. The second time, I was a bit more nervous, but never said anything bitter or caustic. If it happens tomorrow and I go down to the wedding dress shop with no wedding dress to greet me, I am quite sure I will morph into a to-be-wed monster of unimaginable proportions. And I can’t even begin to guess what will happen to me if there is a dress but it’s ugly.

I don’t think I would be so testy lately, if not for the fact that the printers goofed up on my 800 (yes, eight hundred) announcements in between my two no-show appointments with(out) my seamstress. Again, because I am a lover, not an hater, I have been very cooperative about the entire issue. But I am not happy. Not in the least. And I have a wedding budget to work with here. If justice is not mine–and in a timely manner–then this nice wholesome lady…

Could very easily become something more monstrous, like this crazed person:

43 more days. Heaven help us all.

About Camille

I'm Camille. I have a butt-chin. I live in Canada. I was born in Arizona. I like Diet Dr. Pepper. Hello. You can find me on Twitter @archiveslives, Facebook at, instagram at ArchivesLives, and elsewhere.
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6 Responses to Scapegoats and Sundry Monsters

  1. Anonymous says:

    Oh my goodness, dearest Cameeee. I am sure everything will turn out absolutely spendid in the end. I really think you can avoid morphing into monsters if you are patient enough. :) A

    (easy for me to say huh?)

  2. Camille says:


    May I just say I love it…

    1) When you comment on my blogs, and
    2) When you call me “Cameeee.”

    That is why you are amazing.

  3. Geneva says:

    breathe in breathe out. Good job on being patient though. I probably would have freaked if a seamstress stood me up even once.

  4. Melenie says:

    Camille, I must tell you that even though this post is a result of your immense dissatisfaction, I found it most entertaining. Of course, I find all of your blog entries most entertaining! =) I’m so sorry you’re going through this stress, but I have faith that it will all work out just fine.

  5. Anonymous says:

    When did you take that picture of you, Mill? That’s priceless! Love it, love it, love it!!! And who’s the, umm, (insert adjective of choice) kid?

  6. Anonymous says:

    By the way, what is the latest on the invitations?

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